Monday, 4 July 2022
Guess before I finish this song
Friday, 31 December 2021
Take that Omicron away
Standing on the edge of the new year and fighting the sense of vertigo, I wonder about my sanity.
Am I the only person, for instance, who peruses the headlines about Omicron and hears Paul Simon singing in their head?
"Omicro-o-n/ Makes me mask like a mummer/ Brings lock-down into a third summer/ Make me think all the world is falling ill/ Oh yeah/ I'll get a Pfi-i-izer booster...."
My daughters think I'm deranged.Saturday, 16 October 2021
Evocations of COVID
I've been checking my 2018, 2019, and 2020 journals to see what I was doing in mid-October in various years.
It's been very instructive. For one thing, I realised with a start, that in the past three mid-Octobers, I had already begun addressing Christmas cards. (So I started.)
I also realised that, at this time last year, my cousins caught COVID.
In a cruel twist of irony, elder daughter was exposed because she was in quarantine. She had gone straight from Heathrow to my cousins' home in Wiltshire, where she was isolated in a self-contained bedroom belonging to one of her second cousins, who was miles away, attending university.
Unfortunately, the other second cousin was attending secondary school, and he brought the virus home with him. (This was long before vaccines became available.) First, we heard my cousin's wife had been troubled with migraines. Next, elder daughter reported that her teenaged second cousin had "a cold". Our hearts sank. Nobody was getting colds any more.
The second cousin at university urged his parents and brother to get tested. All three of them had COVID. Five days later, elder daughter FaceTimed me to tell me that her senses of smell and taste had vanished.
We were terrified and helpless, eight time zones away. As it turned out, all four had completely different symptoms, and all four recovered within days, although they were locked down for longer. The secondary school, as you can imagine, was thrown into turmoil, as the younger second cousin's classmates were isolated and quarantined themselves.
We didn't tell anyone but close friends and family. As it was, cousins on both sides of the Atlantic had weighed in with their opinions on elder daughter's move to the UK. The most vocal of the dissenting cousins have no children themselves, and seemed to forget that elder daughter is a fully fledged adult.
And besides, this hadn't been her fault. She had followed protocols to the letter.
Today, elder daughter returned to Canadian soil for the first time in over a year, in order to attend a friend's wedding. The ceremony has been postponed three times.
COVID touches and smears everything.
Wednesday, 9 December 2020
Suddenly COVID
Saturday, 5 December 2020
Fade to black
Wednesday, 2 December 2020
Seeing spots
Saturday, 31 October 2020
Hey? (Nay!)
I went to the drug store, as is my custom, on October 31st, to cut down on the possibility that I might consume all the Hallowe'en candy before the little goblins show up.
This year, however, it's unlikely. Across the country, provincial premiers and health officers are declaring a moratorium on trick-or-treating. Even our prime minister, an avid Hallowe'en dresser-upper (sometimes with disastrous results) has declared to the children of Canada that the pandemic "sucks".
We've carved our jack o' lanterns, nevertheless, and, with three or four families with young children in our building, we're prepared to shell out. Perhaps in baggies. Delivered by reacher/grabber.
To fully understand the joke behind this rather wonderful "This Hour Has 22 Minutes" parody, it helps to have: a) been in French Core or French Immersion in the primary grades at a Canadian elementary school within the past forty or so years; or: b) had children in French Core or French Immersion in the primary grades at a Canadian elementary school within the past forty or so years.
Friday, 1 May 2020
Aren't they supposed to be immortal?
Not sure what an angel and a demon are doing under lockdown. "Setting an example" sounds a bit flimsy.
Thursday, 30 April 2020
Instead of sheep
Should it ever become a problem beyond the occasional Valerian, I could always take Bing Crosby's advice and count my blessings. I have a baker's dozen, at least.
1) I am at home with all the comforts thereof, enough food, and a safe place to sleep.
2) I am with my family, including both daughters, and we all are, at the time of writing, comfortable and healthy. I get the occasional uneasiness when I'm stuffy, sneezy, or head-achy, but opening a window usually is enough.
3) We have electricity and WiFi.
4) Demeter is a two-minute stroll (a one-minute panicked dash) away, and she is reasonably comfortable and very healthy.
5) I can still venture forth and get things for my family and particularly Demeter.
6) We are on a beautiful (unusually quiet) street, and our windows afford views of flower beds, trees, and, up until recently, a steadily diminishing number of passersby -- also the occasional delinquent deer. It's spring, something at which Victoria excels.
7) I am actually hearing more from friends than usual, due to, no doubt, their own senses of isolation, but heck, I'll take it.
8) Marie Phillips, due to her own sense of isolation, is blogging again. I'll take it!
9) These days, we have free access to theatre and ballet, courtesy of the Globe, the National Theatre, and the Royal Opera House, among other sources.
10) I have opportunities to pursue family research, my go-to mental health activity in the best of times and the worst of times. I just demolished a major brick wall in the Resident Fan Boy's side of the family tree a couple of days ago. I did lose some sleep over that - due to excitement. Don't say it.
11) We still have access to take-out from several of our favourite eateries, which we support for entirely selfish reasons.
12) Miraculously, some of my favourite shops are offering limited, and very personalized, service: book stores, stationers, hosery... It's my bounden duty to help keep them open, right? And I'm shopping local.
13) I'm not in Hades. Sorry. It had to be said.
Wednesday, 29 April 2020
Confination
This is a video edited from the live concert Stronger Together, broadcast on CBC last weekend. It features Michael Bublé, the Barenaked Ladies, and Mexican singer Sofia Reyes.
The performance is a cover of a recent offering by Barcelona trio Stay Homas, who are riding out this thing by making music from their apartment.
A number of Stay Homas fans are calling out Michael Bublé for covering this song, but I notice Stay Homas has sent a thank-you to all the musicians involved, for using the song to raise money for foodbanks.
Monday, 27 April 2020
"I'm not a doctor." "No kidding."
For all you Mary Poppins fans, who don't mind the occasional cuss-word. (I gather Julie Andrews is one of those.)
Sunday, 26 April 2020
The longest time
This is the Phoenix Chamber Choir (and some friends) out of Vancouver, BC, with a clever take on one of my favourite Billy Joel songs. If you can, get the video to the largest view you can manage, to see what the various singers are getting up to.
Here's the 1984 video, a fantasy in which a sextet of men show up at their thirty-year reunion with most of their hair. (Despite the back-up, Joel recorded all the vocals himself.)
Saturday, 25 April 2020
A room of one's own
Elder daughter has now been in residence for two weeks. Tomorrow, she will emerge from the sofa corner she's been inhabiting in a modified self-isolation, and will venture into places like the kitchen and the laundry-room.
What has become evident is that, with elder daughter here for the foreseeable future, and the Resident Fan Boy working from home for a similar length of time, and no coffee shops, we really need a working area separate from the living area.
The Resident Fan Boy spotted a notice at our favourite second-hand furniture shop, offering "viewing appointments". He made one, and I shuffled the row of totes, laundry baskets, high-boy, and television stand along the eastern wall of our bedroom, and found a space of just under four feet.
The lady at the shop has been home for about six weeks, and has a case of what I'm going to call "pandemic patter". My mother has noticed it when she calls around for her church. Elder daughter noticed it when having a Zoom chat with a group of Hades pals that lasted three hours. The sun was gone when she staggered in from our patio, where she'd gone for privacy.
Furniture shop lady chatted and chatted. Her daughter's boyfriend has moved in, and while he's lovely, she's wondering if he's ever going to leave. She got yelled at by an elderly man at the grocery store, who charged her with his shopping cart, hands trembling on the bar, and bellowed: "She's hogging the meat counter!!"
We understood the garrulousness, and, because it was a furniture store, we sat down.
We've acquired a charming old secretary desk. The top folds down into a plain table, but contains two deepish small drawers, and little slots that could accommodate cheque-sized envelopes. It might be a great place to store theatre tickets -- if theatres ever open again.
I discovered that the desk can line up to the far east corner of the window, so I can get a breath of fresh air and gaze out past the plantations outside. Our floor is slightly subterranean, so I see the flowering shrubs at eye level and beyond, masked people walking their dogs on the sidewalk.
At seven in the evening, the pots and pans will bang in tribute to the health care workers, and I'll hear the clamour, like scores of distant bells.
Friday, 24 April 2020
Staid and skittish
Orsino is played by the impossibly good-looking Oliver Chris, who was posh and funny in the National Theatre's One Man Two Guvnors in 2011 (which was also shown for free three weeks ago, although I saw it in a cinema last November - when you could do that).
I have until Thursday morning to see Twelfth Night, and intend to see it this weekend, as I address birthday cards for my fellow Taureans, and prepare for younger daughter's birthday in early May.
Tuesday, 21 April 2020
Isolation is the key to creativity
Some years ago - never mind how long - I attended a retreat for Victoria Hospice. The main workshop concerned the Myers-Briggs survey.
The test places you on four continuums: extroverts (E) to introverts (I), sensors (S) to intuitives (N), thinkers (T) to feelers(F), and judgers (J) to perceivers (P). There are sixteen "personalities" based on the combinations of the four letters.
The people doing the presentation were astonished that the nurses, counsellors, and volunteers working at the hospice scored mostly on the introvert "preference". None of us were. Helping the dying requires getting your strength from a quiet place.
Let's be clear here; introversion is not a synonym for shyness; it simply means introverts recharge in solitude, while extroverts recharge in the company of others.
Coming into the present day, it has occurred to me more than once that quarantine and/or self-isolation has to be much tougher on extroverts -- unless they're sheltering in place with those who energize them.
Back when I tested, I scored "strong" preferences on three continuums (continui?), but scored nearly evenly on the feeling/judging spectrum. As a result, when I came across this video, I recognized my two closest matches even before the initials flash on the screen.
See if you can spot yours, if you've taken the test, or guess which one (or two) you might be.
Friday, 17 April 2020
Out of puck
I was born in Edmonton, Alberta, so you might be surprised to learn that I loathe hockey. (Or not.)
Oh, I did try to appreciate it in the early years of my marriage, for the sake of the Resident Fan Boy, but, face it, it's a violent, shout-y, interminable game.
However, I was born in Edmonton, so I instinctively hate anything to do with Calgary. I think it's something they put in our baby formula.
This video rather perfectly encapsulates the antipathy that Edmontonians and Calgarians feel for one another, right down to their symphony orchestras.
The theme music for "Hockey Night in Canada" strikes anticipation and longing in the hearts of hockey-lovers - and dread and a certain air of resignation into the hearts of hockey-haters. Until today, I'd never heard the whole theme. The Resident Fan Boy tells me that it's because I never hang around for the show-end credits.
The game actually ends? News to me.
Wednesday, 15 April 2020
Broken concentration
One recent evening, I was getting ready for bed, a ritual consisting of several careful steps, as I divest myself of the day, and set up things I must remember for successfully launching myself into the coming day. This particular evening, this meant setting my FitBit to charge on the computer out in the living room, in preparation for putting it back on my wrist, where it professes to keep track of how well I've slept. I have my doubts about its accuracy, but this isn't the point. The point is, my FitBit vibrates when I have an incoming call or text message; it even tells me who is trying to contact me, if they're among my phone contacts.
My phone, as it happens, was also charging, lying on my bed after one of its "wink-outs". This is something that it started doing a few months ago, I can only conjecture that this is because I've had it for nearly four years, which makes it, in terms of devices, a dinosaur. After winking out, the phone takes about 30 seconds to load back up again, so I set about removing my eye makeup, shoes, and top.
I had just finished brushing my teeth when the landline rang. An 800 number. At 10:30 pm. The nerve.
It was Lifeline, Demeter's emergency service, which detects any movement by Demeter that could be interpreted as a fall. At the same moment, my revived cell phone rang. It was Double Leo Sister, calling from her home 500 miles away. She doesn't call unless it's an emergency; Lifeline must have reached her first when I failed to answer my momentarily disabled cell phone, being unaware of any calls because my Fitbit was charging in another room. I hastily explained that Lifeline was on the landline, and that I'd get back to her, once I'd checked on Demeter. Lifeline was telling me that my mother had fallen, and I told them I could be there in two minutes.
I shoved my bare feet back into my shoes and retrieved my top from the laundry basket. Grabbing both my keys and Demeter's keys, I barrelled into the living to get my coat, as I gave the Resident Fan Boy a quick rundown. He followed behind at some distance as I fled up the dark and deserted street, a dog in some empty house barking at my shadow.
The Resident Fan Boy caught up with me as I pounded the entry code into the front door keyboard at Demeter's condominium building. I told him the stairs would be quicker, and I rushed left, as he turned right to take the elevator anyway. He arrived at Demeter's apartment several minutes after I did.
Demeter was bruised and shaky in her slip. Being a retired physio, she'd managed to regain her feet, and answer Lifeline to forestall an ambulance.
Apparently, her legs had mysteriously given away, and she had folded to the ground. Most of the impact had been taken by her right knee, shoulder, and temple. Her clothes were strewn where she'd fallen, and we improvised an ice pack of frozen perogies, which we applied to her forehead with a damp dishtowel, as she protested gently.
We stayed until she was safely tucked into bed, folding her clothes, and turning off the lights, before retreating back up the block, as I slowed my breathing.
I discovered that in my haste, I'd left my phone on the bed. It promptly winked out once more, as a long parade of texts from my sister came through.
It took a while for sleep to come.
The next morning, Demeter's brow was unbruised, and she was only slightly sore. It didn't occur to me until later, that I had spent the previous afternoon taking the laundry to the laundry with younger daughter, demonstrating how to carefully wipe door handles and elevator buttons on the way, then washing our hands carefully afterwards.
All such precautions flew out of the window when I flew out of the house.
Demeter seems fine.
Tuesday, 14 April 2020
Furthermore, men of Harlech smell like garlic
Twitter had a heigh-day a few days ago with the #dontvisitWaleschallenge, in which "tweeters" messed with travel posters to spread the message about the important of staying home.
Some of them are rather rude; I've actually picked some of the milder ones.
And some of them require some knowledge of Welsh pronunciation.
. . . or a recognition of a particularly funny and sly aspect of Under Milkwood by Dylan Thomas.
I had to explain the last one to Demeter, which is ironic, because she originally explained "Llareggub Hill" to me when I was thirteen.
Monday, 13 April 2020
The devil's playground
In England, pretty well anyone who isn't "essential service" has been under lockdown for about a month now.
One of the strangest - and most British - byproducts of the situation has been the transformation of the television game show Taskmaster into a nation-wide competition for quarantined British families.
The show, which has been on air since 2015, used to centre around five contestants being asked to do something bizarre. I vaguely remember "impress a mayor" being one such assignment.
I was unaware of the direction the show had taken with the arrival of the pandemic, until I stumbled across a YouTube video last week. In that case, the assignment (which had apparently been the second virus one) had been to transform the bathroom into "a great night out".
The following is Task #7, which I tripped over yesterday:
My knee-jerk reaction to watching these is "Golly, some people have way too much time on their hands!"
Then it occurred to me. That's the point.
Sunday, 12 April 2020
Pascal pandemic
The Resident Fan Boy donned his suit, and sat down at the computer to sing hymns at the screen during a prerecorded service from the nearly empty cathedral. Then, in his capacity of church warden, he presided over "coffee hour" via Zoom.
I left him to it and strolled out into the bright sunshine on the deserted street. I delivered Easter chocolate to Demeter, and she told me that it was snowing in Ottawa and she was so sorry for elder daughter. The phone rang. It was elder daughter, asking Demeter to step out on her balcony.
Baffled, Demeter followed me to look down to the front path, where elder daughter stood, having arrived the night before. Elder daughter travelled across the country, but on the last flight from Vancouver to Victoria, two fellow passengers had come from London -- and one of them had a cough. She doesn't want to be any closer than six feet from Demeter for the next two weeks.
This Easter wasn't what we were expecting.
But it could be so much worse.








