Monday, 17 August 2009

Recipe for a less-than-stellar evening

1. Family who has invited us to a barbecue kennels their dog for the evening, citing dog's over-excitability and danger of nipping.
2. Dog-worshipping younger daughter is informed of this at the beginning of the twenty-five-minute car journey to the house and spends the trip in a pall of disappointment, not having seen the dog in two years.
3. Aging mother/mother-in-law of host couple asks me after dinner if I plan to put younger daughter in a group home.
4. I wander off for a solo stroll to weep and regain my equilibrium and wonder in passing if kennelling is this family's solution for everything.

Other than that, our summer stay in Victoria has been quite lovely, thank-you.


Anonymous said...

Ohmigod, people can be appalling.

You have my sympathies.

Social obligations be damned, I wouldn't darken their door ever again.

God love the socially skilled.

JoeinVegas said...

When will aging mother in law be put in a group home?

Persephone said...

Dear T.E., the sad thing is, she has a grandson with Tourette's and a cluster of learning disabilities, and another with some form of dyslexia; you'd think she'd know better. Yet another grandson committed suicide some years ago, so lashing out at her is futile and cruel. Sigh. The fella of the family is quite nice and elder daughter's godfather; that's why we keep in touch.

Thanks JinV for the smile (more like a wicked grin!).

Jane Henry said...

Oh bloody hell, Persephone. I think you are far too kind and thoughtful to people who don't return the courtesy, but otoh being cruel probably won't make you feel better. Maybe it's her own bitterness and anguish that makes her say these things. Awful for you though. Sending you many healing vibesxxx

Ann oDyne said...

There is a blog somewhere named
Mommy Drive-Bys
which is a collection of loathesome remarks like that.
They are weak people - do not let it hurt you - they don't matter.

Good point: one less on your card list at Christmas!
peace and love

Patrick said...

I wonder if the mother-in-law wants to be put in a "group home"

chrissie_allen said...

Disgraceful thing to ask....people are strange.You have risen above it. Glad the rest of your time spent in Victoria was fine though Persephone. Best wishes.

Persephone said...

Thank-you all for the messages of support. The lady is question is the mother of the Resident Fan Boy's oldest friend and probably thinks she knows me well enough to make such a comment. (She doesn't.) She's one of those people who "speaks her mind" (another way of saying she is rather tactless). I doubt she meant to be hurtful, but I also doubt that she has ever given me or my children much thought. In addition, she is not at all well; she's in her eighties and has aged rather precipitously in the past couple of years. So she may not be on my Christmas card list much longer anyway.

Cassandra said...

Hello Persephone, I have read many of your comments on the hilarious Belgian Waffling and have been meaning to visit you for a while, not least because the title of your blog is UTTER GENIUS. Also - and I really hope that you don't mind this - I understand that your little girl is autistic. My son was diagnosed as being on the spectrum in early May. I wondered whether I could e-mail you and ask your thoughts and advice? Especially re the emotional side, I have a feeling that we are on a similar wavelength...

I would be most grateful. My e-mail address is

But of course feel free to ignore!

Persephone said...

Hi Cassandra and welcome!

My younger daughter's official label is PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified), which means she doesn't fit into the qualifications for autism nor pervasive developmental disorder, but they need a label so she can qualify for programmes and funding.... Let's just say she's somewhere on the spectrum, and that's our starting point for any strategy.

If my true name were revealed, I'd lose my superpowers (or something like that), but you're welcome to contact me at . I don't always remember to check that address, so you may want to drop me a reminder here to check my yahoo address if you write me there.